Accidental or Incidental

as i lay on bed, i sensed the distinct odour of antiseptic & listerine
my eyes moved slowly to discover the environs that i was lying in

the pain inside me was acute that i didnt realize the syringe go in
the doc had prescribed a painkiller to alleviate the physical pain

the medicine took its course onto my nerves and into my brain
my eyes closed for a few seconds as thoughts ran wild in my mind

a few minutes back i was lying on the asphalt road on a dingy street
the screeching halt of the car had perfectly synchronized with my fall

the instrument which flipped from my hand was a few metres away
with its moonlight screen still flashing on a dialed call waiting

the haphazard typing, the frantic dialing, the nervousness inside,
everything muted the surrounding sounds that i was hearing

i hadnt noticed the car coming until reality hit me with a jolt
and as i fell, i could not comprehend the sudden turn of events

suddenly pain was everywhere, inside, outside and within
i clenched my teeth as pain and agony engulfed me

i felt strange as i started touching my own hands and elbow
bruises and scratches had made the skin seem alien to mine

thanks to my prayers to God - "you havent ended up with a
joint crack or a fracture" retorted the doc as he walked away

as i tried to sleep, myriad thoughts played havoc in my mind
was it really my fault ? yes ? why me ? why is this happening ?

a friend had completely deleted me from thoughts and that hurt
but the civic road was not a place for trivia and cellphone activity

as i tried time and again, i failed miserably to connect
the call did not connect - but the fall ultimately did

i had rejoiced when God gave me a great friend and
now i quiver in desolation as I have lost what He gave me

a friend who laughed in rhyme and cared dearly
now no longer shares nor cares

pangs of pain abound which fail to explain
the strange mystery behind the veil

i still wait with endurance for judgement day
as i ponder was it all but accidental or incidental

as i mourn, i still keep asking myself . . . .